This year’s White House Correspondents’ Dinner was hosted by Daily Show correspondent Hasan Minhaj. It’s safe to say Minhaj took his fair share of jibes at the absent President.
Going all out was Hasan’s objective that day, and boy did he deliver some amazing zingers:
1. “No one wanted to do this. So of course it lands in the hands of an immigrant, that is how it plays out. Don Rickles died just so you wouldn’t ask him to do this gig.”
2. “We have to address the elephant that’s not in the room. The leader of our country is not here. And that’s because he lives in Moscow, it’s a very long flight. It would be very hard for Vlad to make it. Vlad cant just make it on a Saturday, it’s a Saturday! As for the other guy I think he’s in Pennsylvania because he can’t take a joke.”
3. President Donald Trump tweets at 3 a.m. Sober. Who is tweeting at 3 a.m. sober? Donald Trump, because that’s 10 a.m. in Russia, those are business hours.”
4. “Now, a lot of people think that Steve Bannon is the reason Donald Trump dog whistles to racists and that is not true. Is he here? Is Steve Bannon here? I do not see Steve Bannon. Not see Steve Bannon. Not see Steve Bannon. Nazi Steve Bannon. Nazi Steve Bannon.”
5. “Ivanka Trump is not here either, I wish she was. If she was here, I would ask her a question we are all thinking: why? Why do you support this man? I get it, we all love our parents. But we would not endorse them for president. If someone asked me, should your dad be president of the United States? I would say, my dad? The guy who tried to return used underwear at Costco?”
6. “It finally happened, [Bill O’Reilly] has been fired but then [Fox News] gave him a $25 million severance package, which is the only package he won’t force a woman to touch.”
7. “Now I had a lot more MSNBC jokes, but I don’t want to ramble on or I may get a show on MSNBC.”
8. “Don [Lemon], every time I watch your show I feel like I’m watching a reality TV show. CNN Tonight should just be called, ‘Wait A Second, Now Hold On, Stop Yelling At Each Other! With Don Lemon.'”
9. “You [journalists] have to be on your A-game, you cannot make mistakes because when one of you messes up, [Trump] blames your entire group. And now you know what it feels like to be a minority.”
10. “Its almost, what is it 11? 11 p.m. In four hours Donald Trump will be tweeting about how bad Nicki Minaj bombed at this dinner, and he’ll be doing it completely sober.”
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